I’m NOT okay. And I have learned enough in life to know that it’s okay to not be okay.
I have been a little silent these past few weeks because I’m trying to deal with grief that I never saw coming. The racism and police brutality that has plagued this country since its creation has caused me to internalize a lot of pain. The social unrest and the recent death of another beautiful black man, George Floyd, by way of hatred has caused me to struggle with fear. On top of that I found out that one of my first cousins was murdered and the very next day I received a call that my very own brother was found deceased. Can we say grief on top of grief.
What do you do when you are hurting? Often times we try to put on a huge front. We try to build this perception of ourselves that we are strong and that nothing can break us. But queen, let me save you from years of self-inflicted pain; you are human and humans are fragile and broken individuals. There is no such thing as a STRONG human in and of him or herself. This is why we needed and still need God to come and rescue us through the gift of His son Jesus. He knew the effects that sin would have on us since it entered mankind through Adam and Eve and boy are we experiencing the consequences.
So I am relieved to say that I am weak and broken. It does not make me feel inferior or less than because it gives my heart and mind the constant opportunity to rely on the only one who is infinitely STRONG….God Himself. It gives myself and this world a chance to make Him known and to show off His power to fix and heal the broken. And I am okay with that.
I just wanted to encourage you even through my pain to know that its okay to be broken. And it’s even more okay to let God heal the brokenness in your life.
What to Do When You Are Hurting
- Be honest with yourself and acknowledge your hurt and pain. Your pain is valid and worth acknowledging.
- Allow yourself to feel the different emotions and let them come out in a healthy way ( cry